Living abroad
Lonely on a dependent visa abroad
For the wife who moved to Kuwait or the Gulf for the family, and whose whole day now happens inside the flat.
By Mr. Chakkaravarthy RK
10+ years Experience in Life Coach & Counselling PractitionerDr. APJ Abdul Kalam National Excellence Award & Best Life Coach of India
Internationally Recognized Couples Coach, Relationship Coach, Student Coach and Career Coach. Neurobics Expert, Memory Coach, Train the Trainer and NLP Master.
Updated 2 November 2026 · about 5 minutes to read
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Everyone back home says you are lucky. There is a nice flat, a good school and enough money. And you spend most of the day alone, waiting for someone to come home.
You may have had a job, a degree and a mother five minutes away. It is a real loss, and this guide starts from there.
How do wives on a dependent visa handle their life abroad?
Slowly, by building a small life of their own: a daily routine, a few people and something that is theirs.
Slowly, and by building a small life of their own instead of waiting for the old one to return. It usually takes months, and many women feel low at the start.
Being lonely does not make you ungrateful. You can value what your husband is working for and still miss your own life.
Small first steps
- Get out of the flat at a fixed time each day, even briefly.
- Say hello to one other mother at the school gate.
- Keep a fixed weekly call with one friend who really listens.
How do I make friends in a new country as a housewife?
Go regularly to the same places: school groups, Tamil associations, places of worship or classes. Friendship grows through repeat contact.
Tamil and Indian associations, temples and churches, school parent groups and neighbours in the building are where many friendships begin. It takes a few tries to find one person you are comfortable with.
Choose people who leave you feeling lighter. Groups built on comparison or gossip can leave you lonelier.
Places to try
- A Tamil association or cultural group.
- A place of worship, if that is part of your life.
- A class, walking group or volunteer work.
What can I do all day on a dependent visa?
Check what your visa allows, then study online, learn a skill or volunteer, so the week has a purpose.
Much of the pain is losing the feeling of being useful. Check what your visa allows, because rules differ by country and change over time, and do not start paid work until you are sure.
Online study keeps your skills alive and gives the week some structure. It also makes it easier to return to work when you go back.
Keep your skills alive
- An online course in your own field.
- A skill you always wanted to learn.
- A plan for what you will do in two years.
How do I tell my husband I am lonely abroad?
At a calm time, describe your day without blaming him, and ask for one specific thing.
He leaves in the morning into a full day, and may think you are resting. If you stay quiet to avoid troubling him, the distance grows inside the same home.
Pick a calm time and describe your day without blaming him. Then ask for one specific thing, like one outing together each weekend.
You could say
- "I am not blaming you. I am lonely, and I want you to know."
- "Some days I do not speak to anyone until you come home."
- "Can Friday evening be just for us?"
To talk to Chakkaravarthy RK, call +91 74024 67044. In an emergency only: 112 · Embassy of India, Kuwait: +965 6550 1946 · 14416.
Where Feathers fits
Feathers offers private online sessions for women living abroad, in Tamil or English, at a time when you can talk freely.
This guide is published by Feathers Life Coach, a single-practitioner practice in Neyveli, Tamil Nadu, with sessions online for Tamil families in Kuwait, the Gulf and anywhere else.
Questions people ask first
Is it normal to feel depressed after moving abroad with my husband?
Feeling low after this kind of move is common. If it lasts for weeks or stops you sleeping or eating, talk to someone, and see a doctor where you live.
How do I make friends in Kuwait as a Tamil woman?
Start with school parent groups, Tamil associations, places of worship and classes. Regular contact with the same few people matters most.
Can I do a counselling session without my husband knowing?
Yes. A session is private. Choose a time when you are alone, and voice call works if you prefer no video.
Should I go back to India?
Try not to decide on your lowest day. Talk it through, try a few changes for some months, and then decide together.
Talk it through with someone
One private conversation can make the next week lighter. Sessions are online by video or voice call, in Tamil or English, at a time that suits Kuwait or wherever you are. Nobody else needs to know.